we were supposed to be raking

The leaves were wet on Saturday.
And it was showering intermittently.

So my creative wife decided to have some Halloween fun.


After she finished painting herself...

She helped me to release my inner chipmunk.


Happy Halloween

Friday

tip-o-day

It surprises me when I hear people saying they 'hate' to do laundry.
Then I realize that if I spent and entire day doing laundry I might feel the same way.

Instead of spending all day Saturday running loads of laundry and folding and stacking and storing, try this --do one load each evening or every other evening during the week.

To do one load of laundry takes only several minutes over the course of your regular evening. Here are some tips to make the whole process seamless.

- Gather your load in the morning and toss it in the machine in your way out to work.

- When you get home - flip on the washer and go make dinner.

- After dinner - toss the clothes in the dryer and go tidy the kitchen.

- When you get ready to sit down for the evening, grab the load from the dryer and fold while you watch a show, help with homework or listen to music.

- Just stack the folded clothes in the basket and set them near the stairs or hallway to your room.

- When you head to bed, take the basket and stick those couple items away in drawers and closets.

Without really doing much extra - you're done. By the time the weekend comes, the laundry is under control leaving you time to go do something fun.

happy happy day

29.
o my.

you do realize that now you can say "pushing 30"

Happy Birthday - TheDaughterTheTherapist!

Does anyone else see the interest in the fact that these kids just purchased a station wagon?
hmmm.

Friday

tip-o-day

Don't forget to clean your washer and dryer as you do your other appliances.

Just because your machines may be tucked away in a closet or the basement is no reason to let grime and lint build up.

You don't want your home laundry to look like an unkempt public laundry mat. Any place were cleaning is the primary purpose (such as your bathroom and kitchens) should be maintained to the highest of standards.

An excellent example of this is when Ferris comes home from his college apartment* and says "Why do I feel so much cleaner when I get out of our shower here at home."

For top loading washers - wipe the area around the tub and up under the lid. Any dirt left here can be transferred to your clean clothes. For front loaders - be sure to occasionally wipe the inside of the glass door and all around and under the door gasket. Mold and mildew can develop here if left moist. Also with front loaders be sure to run bleach loads regularly. Clean the top and around the dials of both types of machines to keep them looking new and shiny.

For the dryer - lint is really the enemy. To keep lint at a minimum, be sure not to use too much detergent. Clean the lint after EVERY load. And every so often vacuum out any areas you can reach where lint may collect. You can even buy a special attachment for the vacuum to reach way in under the lint screen.
Remember excess lint in the dryer is a fire hazard.

The outside of the dryer should only require the occasional wiping off. If you have laundry detergent spills there ...for goodness sakes - wipe them up immediately.

Your laundry machines take very little exterior abuse, and can look like new even after a decade of use with minimal care.

* a most tidy college apartment I might add

umm...

Today the house is filling up with ladybugs.

What the hell...
What's with all 'the nature'

Perhaps this is Mother Nature's way of making me look forward to the dead of winter.

Nice try.
I'll just get out the vacuum now.

please just tell me to shut up

but seriously.
How many chipmunks do you see in a day?
No, really -- I want to know.

I have seen 4 so far today.
It's 1:00 pm.
And I have been inside most of the day.

This can't be good.


*note... the chipmunks I saw were outside

Picture this

If you haven't read yesterday's post, please do first.
Go ahead, I'll wait.........

It's a beautiful day out, so we've let the fire in the wood stove die down for the day. I went out to gather more firewood for tonight, as I anticipate it will get chilly when the sun sets.

I am being very cautious as I take each log - as you can well imagine.
My cell phone was in my pocket.
On vibrate.

Do you have a visual?

a chipmunk encounter

I am getting really tired of rodents around here.

This morning I went out to the wood pile... ya know, to gather wood.
We have a rather large wood pile left over from last seasons stocking up extravaganza.
So, granted the wood has been there for awhile.

There was a chipmunk under the last log I grabbed to fill my cart. I screamed - he ran.
We both moved on with our day.

A few minutes later, safely back in the house I realize I had forgotten the ash drawer down by the wood pile. As I rounded the corner of the garage to approach the wood storage area - a chipmunk screamed at me. Have you ever heard one? They sort of chirp. This chirping rodent was clearly not happy.

As you may know we have already spent some time attempting to decrease the chipmunk population around here.
There is really only one thing left to do.

Yes... I spent the afternoon surfing realtor dot com.

G'nite

yes...I meant to post last night.
oops.

yes people... more babies pictures

Today we had a Sunday afternoon party - we had the fam over for the 1:00 game - oh and to celebrate my birthday. Which is today. I am 48 now.
(let me know if you need my address or paypal account)

My amazing wife supplied me with a custom mimosa this morning while we had 5 minutes where The Girls overlapped their nap times.
We didn't have any orange juice so she creatively substituted with baby pear juice.
I think we have a new cocktail here folks. This one is a keeper.

(Notice the bottle drying rack in the back ground. My SIL brought that with all the baby toys. She knows me very well. I just love the thing)

After that some folks came over - here is The Daughter The Therapist snuggling with Thing1 and Thing2.


and... more gratuitous pictures.

our baby play with the babies

Ferris suprised us by coming home for the weekend.
The babies were very happy!

another day in babyland

Today will go down as the day of the poop.

My goodness -- there was so much pooping today.
My well travelled wife thinks its because they have truly settled in (you know how it can be when you're away from home...).

To get out of the house and have some fun, we took the girls to I kea today.
Babies just love I kea.
We have their nifty double stroller - which is perfect at a store like this with its wide ailse and easy access elevators.


We stopped to have a bottle before we left. See that little blue round thing there... we got them toys of course.


After some further pooping, napping, eating and playing - the girls are currently fast asleep.
Here is my baby-loving wife having a nice glass of red to cap off the day, in her spit up covered shirt.

whew... day 1

ok people ... we survived day 1.
i am too tired to capitalize.
kidding...kidding... we are having a blast.
(shh... their parents may have wifi way down there on their tropical island)

FREE dog has already gotten the drill down
babies are basically cheerio dropping devices.

nesting

The twins are coming.
Tonight.

You see... parents of twins need to take time out... for themselves, for each other. They need to reconnect, relax, perhaps drink too much and sleep too much.

That's where we come in.
The babies will be here this evening and will stay with us until next Tuesday!

The babies parents (SIL and BIL) will be somewhere warm and sunny sipping silly frozen cocktails in pineapples out of curly straws.

We have been getting ready all week.
It's so exciting.

Since there are two babies - we are both taking time off from work and will tag team all aspects of baby care.
Since I am very anal organized I have set up changing 'stations' on two floors. Each with its own set of diapering supplies. We have also designated the dining room to be the feeding and playing area. The kitchen sink has been disinfected and is bath ready.

We have cribs set up on the third floor -where we currently have studio/office space. But since there may be times when one baby is fussy and the other needs some rest - we have set up an alternate snoozing place in Ferris' bed.
Wouldn't it be a hoot if he shows up unannounced in the middle of the night and finds a baby in his bed.

I plan to post pictures each day. Let's see if we remember how all this baby stuff works.

I was a little tipsy

We went to a small soiree last night at a friends home.
The evening was lovely - and there was MUCH wine.

We got home on the early side, it being a school nite and all, so I flipped on the football game while we were getting ready for bed.
Just background noise while I got out my PJ's, turned down the bed, removed jewelry...ya know - routine stuff.

I slowly began to realize that I don't really understand the game commentary.
I am a little tipsy.

I focus a little more on the sounds coming from the TV.

Hmm, am I more tipsy than I thought?

I look up at the game, as if adding the visual will offer some clarity.
Nope - still don't get it.

Why does it all sound so foreign to me...
I turn up the volume.
Surely louder will make it clearer. Yeah.

Wait!
I finally realize why it sounds foreign.
It is!

The game commentary was in Spanish.

I checked the station ...twice. It was the major network NBC station.
Am I missing something? Are you all watching football in Spanish?
No entiendo.

Friday

tip-o-day

If you put fertilizer on your lawn, don't ignore your soil pH.
If your soil is too acidic you are basically wasting your money on fertilizer.
Balanced soil helps the lawn to absorb needed nutrients. Spreading lime on your lawn can reduce acidity, known as making the soil sweeter, and also helps to quicken composting of organic materials. Even if you don't fertilize, this can make a big difference in the overall health of your landscape.

You can have your soil tested, usually for a nominal fee, by your local extension. Some garden centers will test it for free, or you can buy a home tester - tho both these methods are somewhat hit or miss. Or you can wing it and simply add some lime.
Its a pretty good guess that your lawn needs it anyway.

I like to lime in the fall - tho you can do it any time of year. Spend the extra buck or two on pellitized lime, unless you want to look like a powdered donut when you're done.

Don't forget your vegetable garden as well!
If you incorporate composting materials in your garden beds (and why wouldn't you) then it's most likely a dusting of lime is a good idea. Tho different types of plants prefer different soil pH - so you may want to test for best results.

Take some caution before adding lime to planting beds, especially those with shrubs. Many shrubs like Rhododendron or Azalea are acid loving so adding lime would be detrimental. Some plants like the Hydrangea will bloom a different color depending on the acidity in the soil. Hydrangeas in acidic soil will bloom blue -- if you add lime (and I think you need to do this quite a bit) you can get the color of the bloom to change to pink.

Lime is inexpensive, environmentally friendly, and safe for kids and pets.

What's your temperature

Fall is here. It's getting chilly.
So what's your temp?
You know...how low does it have to go before you will submit and turn on the heat?

ef bee

I really need to get around to deleting my f@cebook account.
I got a message today from a fellow that lived on the next block over when I was a kid.
I may have played at his house a couple times...tho I really can't remember.
If I saw him on the street I would never know him.

Really... people... is this why you use this thing?

Oh... and it also really cracks me up the pictures that people decide to use of themselves. I am noticing folks in my age brackets (ie. too old for this shit) tend to use pictures of themselves on vacation.

Is it just me?

It usually is... so I'm kinda used to that.

But, why is it the day before we leave for a vacation - even if its just a long weekend as we are preparing for today - that I suddenly need to clean things. I don't just mean setting the house in order, vacuuming, making sure the sink is clear and the laundry put away.
Nooo, this morning I find myself on my knees wiping out under the sink.
And that was at 7:30.
It's gonna be a long day.

Family

What is family? Is it blood? Is it marriage?
Family can come to us in strange ways. Be open to these.

We lost a family member this past week. For our daughter she was blood - for my wife she was family by marriage - for me... well... she was just family.
Is it odd for the sister of my wife's ex husband to be family to us?
Yes.
Of course it is. But life is odd. Wrap your arms around oddity, people. Embrace and treasure the oddity.

Nancy was as unique as they come. She was one of the happiest people I have ever known. She and her husband, Marcus, were folks from a different era, tho not so much older than we. Marcus was that sort of able guy, who are all but extinct now, that can do it all. He built the house they lived in top to bottom - he could build a car out of spare parts laying around the yard -and he had several spare cars out there to choose from. He could wire and plumb and had sheds filled with stuff he 'might need' all over their property. Of course he actually used the stuff.
He loved life. He loved his wife.

She was an artist. Prolific. She painted and sculpted and beaded and drew and and wrote and pasted and cut and sewed always.
She laughed.
Alot.
Loudly.
She did not care what anyone thought of her. Some people claim to be this way - she really was. It truly didn't bother her.
She never threw anything away. Everything had a story, everything had a meaning.
She loved life, she loved her husband and her children and their lives.

Nancy was all heart. Marcus was all ingenuity - together they were ...

Friday night we gathered at their home on the hill with family and some friends around a colossal bonfire.

There was no wake, no church, no procession. It was exactly as she would have wanted it.
So much so in fact it truly felt like she was there.

I stood close to the fire, feeling the warmth, watching firelight lick the trees, a cool autumn breeze tossing little sparks around like fireflies. I looked toward the warm glow of their house seeing people gathered on the deck by a table scattered with bottles of booze and soda in various stages of consumption - she could have so easily been there in that group... chatting and laughing, telling her own stories. I bent my head to listen... to see if I could hear her loud cackling laugh.
I think I did.

I wandered up to the house for a refill. At the table on deck I lifted a wine bottle to the moonlight to see if it held another glassful. I felt her presence there so strongly, I turned to see if she was looking over my shoulder, perhaps to check if there were enough for two glasses in that bottle of red.
I am certain she was.

When we left, we hugged, we cried again, and as we drove away I looked back up the driveway as if I would see her waving goodbye and then turning to clutch Marcus by the arm and head back to her party, and the roaring fire, and her family.
I wish they had.

Peace.

Friday

tip-o-day

Time to check your winter power equipment.
Do you have a snowthrower or perhaps a generator?

It's a really good time of year to check on your winter gear. Change the oil, turn the engine over - make sure everything is up and running. Check your shear bolts, the skid pads and auger to be sure you don't need to replace any worn parts. Plenty of time to order parts before the flakes fly.

I know it may seem a little early but I truly dislike having to monkey around with power equipment once it gets cold out. Plus soon enough we will be caught up with the leaves and taking in the screens and such.
With afternoons still in the 70's it makes for a pleasant experience.
Plus, when that first snow comes I want instant gratification.

Every once in a while

I take every last item out of my closet.
I toss them in a heap,
(a somewhat tidy heap)



shoes too.


Then I give it a good vacuum and wipe down all the surfaces - I like to use a diluted simple green solution, because I think it smells fresh.

Then I decide what gets to go back in.
That's where I am now... in the middle of that heap of clothes figuring out what gets to stay.
I am going to be tough this time. If I am not wearing it...it goes.


I may end up with one pair of pants, two shirts
...and 20 pairs of shoes.

...and you thought I married for love

Last winter we were horrified to find that a dank little crawl space in our near century old home had been taken over by rodents.
While simply moving was our top choice, packing seemed daunting so we decided to 'urge' the critters to relocate.

We started the project on our own but quickly saw that we were outmatched and brought in professionals.
After our guests had permanently left the premisis, we had the crawl space cleaned out and sanitized. All that was left was to re-insulate and close up the openings so no future happy families could move in. We had already dumped quite a bit of money into this little creepy hole in the wall (most likely a coal access or some such thing),

so when I got further estimates to finish the job - my fearless wife stepped in...literally.

We went to our local big box store and purchased insulation, and the cutest little hazmat suit.

We added gloves, goggles and a mask - and she was ready to go.










Clever gal that she is - she suggested we use the halogen work light to make it bright and cheery in there. See how good lighting can dramatically improve your space.

The work went quickly with me on the outside cutting lengths to size and handing them in. There were times when she was pretty far in there... so I pushed them in with a broom handle. heh.

Can you see why she is such a catch?

Friday

tip-o-day

Remember as the fall comes and we prepare for winter - don't store firewood in or near the house. This includes your garage and basement.
At this time of year the wood is teaming with insects and you certainly don't wan't to invite them in.

If you plan to buy wood for this winter season, now is a good time to do that. It gives you plenty of time to get it stacked and covered and will also give it a month or two more of seasoning if its not quite dry yet.

work

From my work pal, Kate:

I have a Magic 8 Ball on my desk and I am not afraid to use it.

sunday afternoon

I haven’t blogged this before… and I only do so now really so that I can tell you a story where its relevance will matter.

My mom is sick. She has cancer… as oh so many do. My mom’s cancer cannot be cured. And so we move through these days and months in treatment, in limbo… in life.

She was diagnosed in March – and one of her great hopes was to make it to football season.
And here we are.
Tho I fear she will take the news of B ruschi’s r*tirement worse than her own diagnosis... we are poised and ready to take in another Patriots season - in hi-def of course.

Every year here in southern Connecticut a group of motorcyclists get together to do a charity ride for 9/11.
By ‘a group’ I mean over a thousand of them.
I’ve blogged about this before… and we try to be there every year to cheer them on.
It’s really quite moving.


We like to toss some lawn chairs in the car and head over to Main Street in our town to watch. As soon as we see the riders I will call my mom who lives in the next town over in a retirement community right on the riders route. She then makes sure all the old folks from the village are out by the road in time.

This year however, not sure if it was the timing or perhaps we were too busy, maybe it wasn’t well advertised– we were unaware of the date of the ride.

Yesterday mom was resting in her recliner and watching some afternoon TV. Chemo leaves her rather wiped out for a couple days, and so her recliner is her weekend pal.
When the sound of some loud motorcycles came she waited impatiently for them to pass so she could hear her show.
But there were more… and more… and it didn’t stop.

She went to the door.
There were more…
It slowly dawned on her what was going on.

She realized no one from the village knew - no one was out there to cheer them on.

And so … pale, tired, shaky and little nauseous – she went out the door and slowly made her way across the lawn - to the curb.
There she stood all by herself… waving, tears streaming, completely moved by the sight of those thousand motorcycles.

Friday

tip-o-day

Some of products I use on the lawn require watering in. We have a pretty big yard so getting out the hose and sprinkling the lawn is really not an option.

In the case of grub control - I like to get that watering in right away. I don't like the idea of the chemical sitting there for too long.

So to keep the environment as safe as I can under such circumstances*, I spread the materials before an expected rain shower.

For quick results, I like to begin spreading just as the rain is starting.
To do this I simply fill the hopper of my broadcast spreader and cover the top with a piece of foil. My gourmet wife keeps the large size foil around to cover her large baking pans - this fits perfectly over my spreader. You can also use saran warp or even a garbage bag.

Toss on a rain hat and some tall rubber boots to complete the look.



Try you're best not to apply the product when very heavy rains are expected. Not only can this be harmful to plants and wildlife but you will simply waste your money as your product washes away.

*I do generally recommend natural grub control methods - such as Milky Spore. But for this size yard in the current economy it's a bit cost prohibitive.

last mom standing

The Free dog has 'hot spots' - she is on antibiotics and a topical treatment.
She has had two accidents in the house so far this week. Please keep in mind she is 80 pounds. An accident can require almost an entire roll of paper towels.

I came down with a stomach virus. I was not even able to stand for an entire day.
I am just starting to eat rice and pudding today.

Ferris was supposed to move into his first off campus apartment yesterday, but he was near death so we dragged him out to a clinic. He has strep. He got some good drugs. Today we are sharing pudding.

And my wily wife - she's fine.
Somebody has to take care of all of us.

tips

Hmm, there used to be 'tips' here every Friday
[scratching head, looking under desk]

I wonder where they went.

I love uniforms

This morning we took our coffee out to the side porch.
It's shady and cool there and we can watch the morning traffic go by on our busy street.

weese (looking at a ginourmous SUV with a soccer mom on her cell)
"Ugh, another one on the phone...I wish I were a cop"

my coffee-sipping wife:
"You are a cop...you just don't have a uniform"

TMI

Have you ever felt a little...something, maybe something wasn't quite right, you feel a little off. So you start to look up your symptoms on the internets.

C'mon...you know you do.

I've noticed that every major disease, affliction, complication or illness seems to involve "unexplained weight loss".

Clearly I'll live to 100.

turn the heat up

Last week I blogged about being hot.

It was technically not that hot outside, in fact it was quite comfortable. Here in my home office,however, in our un-air-conditioned attic things were a bit steamier.

Today temps are predicted to go into the mid 90's.
Should be interesting up here today.
At high noon - my office temp is 81.

It takes until mid afternoon to really get toasty up here. All that radiant warmth off our Timberline dark gray architectural shingles just swirls in here.

I'll update with a thermometer pic later this afternoon.
If I can stand the heat.


4:40 p.m. update - the sun went in...its only 84 degrees up here. I think I will survive after all.

Re-inventing the wheel

Even tho most of my workdays are spent in my warm, dark home office – I do occasionally put on clothes and take the ride into our corporate office building.
When I come to the office, because we are mostly a work-at-home team, office space is shared. There are docking stations and monitors all over the place. So basically I can come in and pop my laptop in most anywhere for my workday.

Today I am in a new location. It’s quite adequate – although a bit chilly and bright for my tastes.
Uncharacteristically, I forgot my little wireless travel mouse. I love my little mouse.

The mouse I am using today has no middle wheel button.
I had no idea how attached I was to the wheel button.

whooo weee

Have you ever been so hot that you need to take your jewelry off.
As if it might be cooler to just not have that necklace on your neck.

Don't get me wrong here.
My people are a short, round island people*.
We love the heat.
Bring it.

* This is a common joke of mine. My father was Italian, his mother grew up in Sicily. I tend to favor that side of the family in the short, round shape and fetching olive tone... thus 'my people'.
Oh... and my mother? The W.A.S.P. - she was simply the vessel.

a token, a favor... a small parting gift

I went to the dentist yesterday.
They gave me a goodie bag. You know - new toothbrush, a small tube of paste and some floss.
I love goodie bags
Really, it doesn't take much to make my day.

I think we should get goodie bags from all our appointments.
You could get a new pencil or notepad from your accountant.
How about a home breathalyzer from your attorney?
Your shrink could give you a complimentary xanax with a tissue pack.
Even the gynecologist can join in the fun....

Little Bathroom Cups

At any given moment you may find one, or more, little bathroom cups strewn about our patio. You know those little cups. The little 3 oz'ers - the ones you get with the Dixie bathroom dispenser. We've had the dispenser mounted to the wall next to our bathroom sink since the kids were little. Always sure to get happy, colorful cup designs - like fish or jungle animals with smiley faces, or a favorite cartoon character.

I suppose we don't use them so much anymore since we've stopped being summoned for a midnight sip of water - or to administer Tylenol just before bed. But we still have the dispenser and I still buy happily designed little cups.


I regularly toss these little cups out the bathroom window.
In fact, I just did last night.

My sentient wife was washing dishes in the kitchen below when she saw it drop by the window in front of her. She didn't flinch.
That's because she knows.
She knows that in that little cup there is an unsuspecting spider... perhaps a witless beetle, or any number of other tiny crawling intruders that has just been launched for the ride of their lives.

No really... it's way more humane than just squishing them on the wall.
I often wonder why they are all so enamored with crawling around the tub, perhaps they like the ride so much they make their way back up for another turn.

addiction

We have been celebrating our anniversary on July 26th for many of the 24 years we've been together. At some point over the course of those two dozen years we just decided to pick a date that we could call our anniversary. It certainly helped in tracking the years gone by. But the date was basically made up... invented for convenience.
Now -we have a new, 'real' date. So we will celebrate then, but for old times sake, we thought we should at least honor this day with a dinner out.

Plus we were too tired to cook on Sunday.

Tired in a really good way.
Tired in a way where you may just need to nap a bit. Perhaps several times during the course of the day.


So after we dropped off our little overnight guests we went out to be served. To have someone bring us food and drink while we sat, relaxing and enjoying each others company.

It was just after dinner that our addiction reared its ugly head.
We were full.
We were tired.
And yet there, right there, on the way home was...
Starb*cks.
Home to the highly addictive Frappuccino.
What the hell do they put in those things?
We simply
had.
to.
have.
one.

There we were physically exhausted, stuffed full of sushi only to be topped off with a huge cup of frozen caffeine.

Not only did we clean the kitchen, vacuum and put away the port-a-cribs when we got home - but we poured another glass of wine and enjoyed it by the firepit.

Ahhhh. They are tasty. And cold. And refreshing. I actually want one right now.. the morning after... I could use one - just one...a small one - then I'll stop. Really.

Friday

tip-o-day

Today's tip is Pay Attention.

Just this week I called two companies with which I have accounts and got adjustments to my bill. I saved about 60 bucks just by paying attention.

If you are a customer in good standing most companies are willing to work with you. Even if you are calling about a mistake that perhaps you made.
An example of this would be; last month I failed to sign up in time for a savings package to call Ferris while he was in Italy at a discounted rate. The phone company generously back dated the package price and saved us money on transactions that had already occurred.

When you call -be sure you are in a calm state, a state of curiosity...not anger.
If a mistake has been made on your bill - it's most likely a software error. A defect. I work with this stuff all day long. There is no reason to be angry. These things happen. In fact, I like to think of defects as job security... well, for me.
When you make a call all filled with rage - you do nothing more than set the tone for the conversation.

So, be peaceful. Pay attention. Save money.

I love my sensible shoes

I was sitting at my desk at work feeling a little chilly - luckily I had brought a sweater. Sometimes the A/C in the office gets to me.

I went to get a cup of tea to warm up and passed the elevator on my way.
Standing there was a very attractive young woman in a rather clingy short dress. Once I got past the oogling - I noticed her clingy little dress was short sleeved and she wore strappy high heeled sandals. While I was easily able to appreciate every curve - nothing about that outfit looked the least bit comfortable.
I mean I may be a little colder than most - but this woman had very little on, and her feet were completely exposed. Brrr.

A fellow walked up to also wait for the elevator. He was wearing standard business-ish attire. Pleated pants with sensible shoes, I will take a leap and assume he was wearing stylish, yet comfortable, trouser socks. Long sleeve dress shirt with a short sleeve white T underneath.
He looked very comfortable.
He looked warm.
I can understand a woman wanting to look pretty and fashionable - but to me that woman standing there just started to look - -- well ... cold.
I wanted to toss her a blanket.

How many times have I seen a fancy couple out to dinner. The woman in a gorgeous sleeveless dress, and sandals. Her manly date in a suit. In November.
sheesh women...

It's times like these that just make me so happy to be a sensibly dressed lesbian.

Beni's

Today I am signing up for some health/medical benefits at the ginormous, international company that I work for now. First, before I rant --let me just say that I love the people I work with and the company has been incredibly kind and accommodating.

But ... we are ginormous - and there is this huge HR machine. The company is teaming with HR folk.

In order to sign up my 'legal' wife on my benefits, even tho we have a legal marriage certificate, I still need to have papers notarized and show 'proof' of our relationship.
If I were married to a man I would need to show no proof at all. I would simply jot his name down on the web-form and click Submit.

Fine... fine... I'm gay... ok ok.

So I am making copies today... and I prepared a letter:

Attn: Benefits Team

Please find the enclosed documents:

• a notarized copy of the Domestic Partnership Affidavit
  
• and as proof of partnership I provide:
  
  
  
  • a copy of our valid/notarized Connecticut marriage license
    
  • a copy of our drivers licenses showing our common address
    
  • a real estate tax statement showing both our names on our property
    
  
  

Please note we have owned this home together for 21 years. We are listed as each others primary beneficiary on every account we have, we have joint bank accounts as well as credit cards, and our wills show each other to be the primary recipient. And our children refer to us as their ‘parents’.

Sadly, married same sex couples need to further prove their commitment past a legal marriage document. A document, which by the way, is not required at all when claiming an opposite sex marriage.

Please let me know if you need any other information from me.

Thank you,

Friday

tip-o-day

Have you ever gotten that paralyzed feeling from some silly, seemingly daunting, project.
Perhaps it's straightening out the basement, or weeding the garden, or in my case currently.... filing.

Sometimes - my filing gets ahead of me. And so it waits.
Piling up.
It waits until I find this non-existent block of time... perhaps a rainy day, or maybe a blizzard where I am certain I will just make a cup of tea and sit down and plow through it.

um.. shyeah.. not gonna happen.

Does that happen to you?

So try this.
Just do a little.
No, really... just set a tiny little goal.

Today I filed a handful of papers.


You can't tell from looking at my piles.

But I know there's less now.

And I feel good.

where is weese?

"I heard she and her adorable wife got a timeshare on an island somewhere."

"really?!"

"yup... and there is NO internet access - BUT they have beachfront property and someone to bring them cool things to drink and fresh towels."

"really?!"

"yup... and they don't even have a phone. all they brought was a couple changes of clothes, oil paints and an easel for that artistic wife of hers, and several pairs of walmart reading glasses."

"wow."

"yup... doncha want to go too?"

Friday

tip-o-day

This tip is brought to you by Bammies.
Bammies is my mother-in-law.

Honestly I never expected to get a tip of the day from this woman...

Bammies likes to wear crocs knockoffs.
Bammies noticed tho that on hot, humid days her feet perspired.
Bammies solved the problem.


Had the picture been better I would have left it at that.
But since its kinda hard to make out...go ahead and 'biggin' the picture - notice the feminine pad placed perfectly in her shoe.
It's not only a perfect fit, but the adhesive back secures them in place. Plus... you can change them out as often as needed. What's better than that?

Of course its not nearly as funny until you hear that Pop pop is wearing them now too.
:)

the pregnant pause

I cannot stand reality TV.
O sure... I thought Survivor was nifty -- when it began ten years ago.

But now reality TV makes me want to toss the big backlit box out into the driveway.
Yes, I could just turn it off and walk away - but I am weak and clearly addicted.

You see we have this routine, and I am all about routine.

Each evening my cuddly wife and I retire to our suite to ready ourselves for rest. This inevitably happens 10 minutes or so before the hour. During this time I switch on the TV in preparation to begin some carefully selected show that will be used for the sole purpose of setting the sleepy-timer to.
For the 10 minutes or so before our show on the Great Pyramids, or Mega Movers (a weese fave) or perhaps Animal Cops comes on, there are the final moments in a myriad of REALity TV shows.

It seems to me - granted I don't actually watch the shows -- that every single one of them ends with this cliche, irritating pause before they 'reveal' the big outcome to the nervous contestant.

You know this pause. Maybe once a long time ago - it felt new and clever and left you on the edge of your seat. But seriously, how many times can a pause like this be effective, certainly its no longer gripping.

The host will lead with some ubiquitous unfinished sentence... some examples are (but not limited to):
"The audience voted and ..."
"The amount is..."
"The winner is..."
The camera then pans to the nervously awaiting contestant... and there
we

P
A
U
S
E

And so as quickly as I can I grasp for the remote, fumbling with the buttons only to switch to another channel with another host doing the same stupid pause with a different, yet frighteningly identical set of moronic contestants.

Why oh why do I not toss the thing out the window.

The twins and our prodigal son

We had a sleep over this weekend with the SIL and BIL's twin girls. We had so much fun.






I told them some stories from the Grimm brothers. And then a couple of less dark classics. Tho I don't remember all the details of most fairy tales so I embellished a bit. I think my rendition of The Three Bears was a hit.









Then Ferris...who we may now need to refer to as Giacomo - returned from his Italian adventure. The stories on the car ride home were unbelievable. He told me as we walked through the airport parking lot that this was the best decision of his life and may never be topped. He saw Rome, and Florence and Milan and the Alps and the Amalfi coast and Sorrento and Cinque Terre and ... the list goes on... all while enjoying a women to men ratio of about 10 to 1.

As you can see...he'll be going back.*

He brought gifts for all.. including little Firenze soccer jerseys for the girls.

*A traditional legend holds that if visitors throw a coin into the fountain, they are ensured a return to Rome.

Friday

tip-o-day

Ok people... break it up...nothing more to see there... let's move on.

Alrighty then, today I want you to go out your front door, turn around, and look with fresh eyes.
Is your door clean? Is the glass clear and sparkly? Do the walk or steps need to be swept?

This is not only the entry into your home, but into your lives, your energy, your spirit. Let it be mindful, orderly and welcoming. You don't need expensive door knobs and knockers.
A simple entry that is tidy is most welcoming.

I've noticed that ours is in need of some paint and new weatherstripping...thanks to pets trying to open the door themselves. On the inside the FREE dog has just about clawed her way through the wood to get out at menacing delivery folk. Basically, the door is ruined. A new door is not in our budget this year, so ... I sweep, clean the glass, and shake the mat often.

My imaginative wife has placed a table on the porch by our entry. It holds a couple plants and some candles to greet our guests. If you come in the evening she will light them just prior to your arrival - even if evening has not yet cast its full shadow.

Remember, the entry is not only for guests. Every time you walk into your home you should feel centered and peaceful. A welcoming entrance can set that stage.

Go on... get up... go look.

let the sun shine in

Ok... well if there were sun. It would be able to shine in after today.

We hired someone to raise the canopy on a big maple tree right behind our house.
You can see the tree in the picture below.
We started to notice an increase in moss and mold because there was just not enough light and air.



The only way to do this is to have someone climb the tree because its not accessible with a bucket.
From my office window here in the attic I am at eye level with this fellow as he begins the job.


Then there is this other guy down on the ground.


They have to lower the branches because of the patio and plantings below the tree.
They are being very careful.


Whaddya think Sara?

what time is it?

Do you wear a watch?
I do somewhat regularly.

Have you ever worn your watch on the 'other' wrist?

It's so... unnatural.

Vitamin D

I would be the first to tell you that I love a rainy day.
I have no problems with gray gloominess. I have mentioned on several occasions that I prefer to work in a warm, dark environment.

Even with the ridiculous amount of rain we are getting here in the North East I was trodding along just fine. Oh sure... there was the lawn anxiety. But I can have that in the best of weather.

Until this morning. When the sun came up. My sun-lovin wife and I had our coffee on the patio and soaked up the D. It was delicious.
Just now, I simply took the trash to the street -- I felt lifted and refreshed. I could feel my Chi shift.

I am impressed. Thank you Gaia.

too busy

I am too busy.
Or maybe ..its all in my head.

Friday

tip-o-day

Today ...a couple of thoughts.

This first was sent to me by a warm, cuddly friend. She makes a habit of sending us mindful passages.
The sentiment is nothing new - but it gave me such joy just to read it and savor it.

The most important thing in all the world is to be kind.

and this ... this one occurred to me spontaneously, and I wanted to share:

Even a small piece of cheese can make everything right.

Enjoy your weekend peoples.

Opposites may attract, but...

My companionable wife and I do most things together. We truly enjoy each others company and generally make a good time doing the most mundane of errands.

That said – there are things we not only do on our own because we enjoy our individuality ….but frankly there are just some things that the other doesn’t want to do.
For example – I am not a good craft store pal. I get impatient and grumpy. I just don’t understand the laboring over subtle shades of blue beads.

My creative wife on the other hand is not really a great Home Depot buddy. While she is perfectly happy going with me – she tends to wander off …which then takes quite some time roaming around the store to find her once again (often with a cart full).

This past weekend my adorable, wandering wife accompanied me to said Home Depot where… included on our list would be some considerable contemplation in the toilet repair aisle.
Before we left home I assessed the dire toilet situation – took some measurements, poked around and was fairly prepared to look for the items I thought I might need.

So there we are in the plumbing aisle. My somewhat disinterested wife next to me while I pondered washers and hosing and such. After a short time of me wondering whether I could get away with the 9” tubing since the 8” was not available, or perhaps I should go longer to make a loop…but not too long… – she declares –

“Wait… this fixes 90% of toilet problems”

I turn… in disbelief… to see her holding a brightly colored box… a kit if you will.
A kit.
Really…
90% of the problems.
As I hold my handful of little washers and bolts.

“Lemme see that…”

So we took the brightly colored kit home (along with a couple of the individual parts…just in case).

Worked like a charm.

Somehow I doubt I’ll ever be able to reciprocate in the bead aisle at Michael’s.

This is what happens...

when I give my green-thumbed wife my car.