Courtesy

from:
Main Entry: cour•te•ous
Pronunciation: 'k&r-tE-&s, British also 'kor-
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English corteis, from Old French, from court
1 : marked by polished manners, gallantry, or ceremonial usage of a court
2 : marked by respect for and consideration of others
synonym see CIVIL

Pardon me,
No, no after you.
Allow me.
Would you mind if…
Please,

Common courtesy. That’s a catch phrase. Altho courtesy just isn’t so common any more. Remember chivalry. No. chivalry is not sexist.

Main Entry: chiv•al•rous
Pronunciation: 'shi-v&l-r&s
Function: adjective
1 : VALIANT
2 : of, relating to, or characteristic of chivalry and knight-errantry
3 a : marked by honor, generosity, and courtesy b : marked by gracious courtesy and high-minded consideration especially to women

The basic premise behind chivalry is not sexist, its being aware of those around you. (“high-minded consideration”), its courtesy. Look at the classic old-movie-chivalrous-act -- a man throwing his overcoat over puddle so that the woman can walk on it. Ok.. sure – this wouldn’t happen today for a myriad of reasons – but the point is, the man was aware of his surroundings and noted its immediate affect on another person and then strove to alleviate that other persons discomfort. You can apply this same theory today. Just don’t be throwing your overcoat on the ground… especially if its wool. (hmm, Friday tip idea).
This theory can be used behind the wheel too. Allowing someone to go first makes you feel good. Driving is not a competition. It doesn’t matter who is in front or who gets there first.
I tend to be chivalrous. I suppose it’s somewhat unsuspected in a woman…but I am a lesbian so the bar is raised. I also appreciate being treated that way in return, by men or women… altho in reality it is almost always by a man.
As I said the act of chivalry is not sexist and therefore I do not treat it as a sexist act. It’s a thoughtful act.
When a man quickens his step ever so slightly as to reach the door before me, I respond by slowing just enough, and then thanking him and smiling at his gesture. When a man reaches his arm over the elevator door to keep if from closing on me (which we know is impossible with modern technology) I am gracious when I enter. I acknowledge his kindness, regardless of its actual benefit. These kind men are being gracious and thoughtful. It is the least I can do to be thankful in return.

Now, please pardon me, as I need to excuse myself to attend to another matter. It’s been ever so lovely blogging with you this afternoon, we simply must blog again soon.
Thank you for stopping by.