Friday, December 28, 2007



You don't need a tip today... go have some fun.
The year is almost over.

Go on.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Friday, December 21, 2007



Are you wrapping gifts this holiday season?
Will your significant other person be wrapping them with you?

Here are some tips for just such an occasion:

  • set the mood,
    - put on some happy holiday music
    - start a fire*
    - pour a glass of something you love - wine, a cold lager, eggnog...

  • create some space
    - clear off the kitchen or dining table
    - use the chairs to hold unwrapped gifts or supplies

    and most importantly
  • duplicate your wrapping supplies,
    this will make for a truly harmonious wrapping experience.
    - 2 pairs of scissors
    - 2 rolls of tape

*for safety weese suggests only starting fires if you have a fireplace or wood burning stove.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

The Classics

I was out running errands on lunch today and uncharacteristically flipped on the radio.
I happened upon Peter and the Wolf – an updated narration by David Bowie. While not the classic, I was very pleased. Motoring around town reminiscing of my childhood… cold winter afternoons in feety pj’s listing to scratchy recordings and conjuring up fantastical images in my head.

I started to imagine how my grand wife and I might snuggle up with our children’s children, perhaps in front of the fire and listening to and participating in this wonderful musical tale – learning about the instruments and how their sounds make us feel the action and the emotion of each scene.
Then …
“And if one would listen very carefully, he would hear the duck
quacking inside the wolf, because the wolf, in his hurry, had swallowed her alive.”

Ah yes.. I had forgotten what a dark little tale Prokofiev can weave.
Hmm, perhaps we should start with something by the Brothers Grimm? ;)

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Gift? cards

I am probably about to piss off a bunch of people.
So… Merry Christmas.

I keep seeing these advertisements… there is one for Home Depot – where this pathetic fellow wanders around the store with one of the sales folks looking for the perfect gift for his wife - first, unless his wife is a lesbian, he’s probably in the wrong store – anyway, he finally picks up a gift card and they both concur that this IS the perfect gift.

Macy’s has this online popup ad of a young, handsome couple hugging. She is holding up a Macy’s gift card. She looks extremely pleased.

Sorry people. I cannot fathom any reason to give any working* adult a gift card.
Even more RIDICULOUS is giving your spouse a gift card.

‘Here honey, please take some of OUR money and go shop at THIS store.’
‘I mean.. I love you so much… that I give you permission to spend this exact amount of money on yourself. Hope you can find something you like.’
‘What I am trying to say is I really don’t know that much about you, and I don’t really want to invest any effort or time learning anything about you.. but I want you to be happy, because our lives are so much easier when you are happy and clearly I don’t know how to make you happy, but I saw an advertisement that said you would be happy to have this little card.’

If you must buy a gift card – buy one from Target or Stop and Shop and give it to someone who needs it – to someone who is hungry or cold. And if you absolutely insist on buying your spouse a gift for the holiday – get a puppy… I mean really, who doesn’t love puppies.

* by ‘working’ I refer to being employed at a position which provides enough money to live by. There are many ‘working’ adults who don’t make enough to feed and clothe their families, despite their earnest efforts.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

winter projects

We are making great progress on our bedroom redecorating project, in fact we are ahead of schedule. The walls and ceilings are painted, leaving only the trim to finish up.
My hard-working wife put the final coat of poly on the newly stripped wood floor on Sunday.

We were sitting in the living room enjoying a cocktail after our days work on the project when Ferris yells down the stairs...
"Mom, why is this floor all sticky?"

Monday, December 17, 2007

Lets do lunch.

We had lunch this weekend with dear people.
So dear in fact that when we called at the last minute to change our dinner plans to lunch plans they happily adjusted.
We had requested the time change because Ferris was rolling in from his last final of the semester Saturday evening. A sophomore still needs to be coddled after his finals are over. So we needed to be home... to coddle.

On the ride home from our delicious lunch with delightful company - we realized just how nice it is to be heading home before dark on a cold winter day.
Summers are meant for long, lingering nights on the patio over cool cocktails. Winter seems well suited for lunch mimosa's and afternoon chatter.

I think we may be starting a new seasonal shift in our social schedule.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Friday, December 14, 2007



did you want a tip?
welp, I'm busy... come back later.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

A load of laundry a day keeps... weese happy.

I used to do laundry everyday.
It was by choice.
I was never one of those people to wait and do several loads over the course of the weekend. I didn’t want my weekends filled with laundry.
One load each night(ok… maybe sometimes two and sometimes I would skip…).
Wash/dry …then two minutes to fold and right upstairs to be put away and your done!

But I used to do laundry for more people.
These days we don’t have enough for a load every night. But old habits die hard.
So I had to chuckle last night as I was hanging my freshly laundered shirt… that I had just worn to work.

Friday, December 07, 2007



We’ll be knee deep in our bedroom makeover project this weekend. Perhaps I will post some pictures as we go.

So here are some painting tips for you.
After opening the can of paint – take a hammer and nail and put some holes in the lid gutter. Then after pouring from the can to the paint tray excess paint will drain right back into the can.

Also – I am always sure to pour with the directions side up. That way when paint dribbles down the can I don’t worry about not being able to re-read important information such as drying or recoating times.

Perhaps my hardworking wife will offer some floor stripping tips in her sidebar -> to grow back cilia.

Monday, December 03, 2007

She picked me

It's important in a relationship to celebrate your differences... or at least learn to laugh about them.

Whenever I get particularly neurotic - I simply remind my fraught wife that she picked me.

And I of course ...picked her.


We have decided to redecorate our bedroom.
Let me give you some background on the project.

A dozen years or so ago we enlarged our room by creating an opening into an adjoining bedroom. That room had been Ferris'. We moved him to the ever so slightly smaller back bedroom. He was not particularly pleased... but I image now that he lives in a dorm room he has probably gotten over it, or perhaps he can begin therapy early... anywhoo...
When we took up the rug in there the wood floors underneath were in a sorry state of shellac and paint and who knows what.
We decided it would be very 'Pottery Barn' to paint the floors black. We were such Pottery Barn lesbians. The floor came out good and it was a striking look with our dark sage walls with crisp cream trim. When the black paint started to chip and show the reddened shellac underneath we considered it rustic... cool.

It finally got to a point where 'cool' got old.
That point was sometime last week.
So we knew we needed to address the floor as part of this makeover. Refinishing the oak floors would be the right thing to do - but really it would mean refinishing the entire second floor and, while you've got the mess going, the stairs should be done too.
This would mean moving all the furniture off the second floor and sleeping else where for a week or so - not to mention the cost.
That option was nixed early on.
Our next idea was to simply repaint the floor, perhaps a happier color.

We thought before we bought any floor paint - just for giggles we would try a little bit of stripping solution we had left over on a small inconspicuous area. Just to see.
In steps my adorable wife.

I walk into the room Saturday afternoon and there is a smallish stripped area of the floor.
Inconspicuously in the middle of the room.

by the time I grabbed the camera she had already started removing baseboards and stripping more floor

She cracks me up.
She has about 1/4 of the floor done now.
The floor underneath has a ... lets call it a distressed look.
People pay big money for distressed these days.
It's very Pottery Barn.

Saturday, December 01, 2007


Did I complain... just last week...
about raking in 34 degree weather?

Friday, November 30, 2007



The holidays are fast approaching. So I suppose today's tip should be holiday-ish.
I should tell you to gather twigs from your yard and spray paint them silver and gold for a festive center piece. Perhaps how to make a wreath out of wine corks, or bottle caps or used tampon wrappers. Maybe even how best to set your holiday table.
But no. Martha I am not.

My tip for you this holiday season is to conserve. Conserve your energy, conserve your resources, conserve your finances.
Make this the year that you make a holiday budget. Don't overbuy. We all already have too much stuff. Getting presents becomes numbing rather than a treat. The whole concept of returns...just makes me cringe. What is the point of all of it.
Buy a bottle of wine for someone ..then share it with them. Bring a baked good - or if you're coming to my house, a dish of raw vegetables.
I am not condemning a little gift exchange - just be reasonable. Think it through. If you have to give Aunt Elsy a gift receipt for the purple flowered turtle neck... then perhaps you should re-think.

Let's all buy less. Drink more.

Monday, November 26, 2007

My Artistic Wife

I am sure I have mentioned before that my adorable wife is an artist.
She draws and paints. Watercolors, oils... sometimes pencil - she's wicked with a box of crayolas.
I marvel at her talent. She is very good. Really. I am not just saying that because ...well you know.

Lucky for her she picked me. You see, where she excels at the creative with her fine eye and keen color sense - she sorta lacks in areas of ... well, common sense.
Not a problem, because I am filled with sound judgement. I brim with it.

For example, she would think nothing of sending an original watercolor postcard all the way across the country via the trusty United States Postal Service - without even putting it in an envelope.

It is at these times that I try to impress upon my blithe wife some prudence. Sometimes she listens, sometimes she simply wanders away.
I have long since learned to let her wander happily off.

She has such a gentle way about her. She lets things take on a life of their own.
It will be fine - she says lightly.
But what about the rain - I try to assert.
If the watercolor gets wet (ends up a soupy mess) then that will be art too, she explains to me.

She teaches me to be patient and calm and centered. (she beat me to the post office)
She is my muse.

The watercolor? Well... however it reached its destination - it was exactly as it should be.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

It's really quite remarkable how quickly one rakes leaves when its 34 degrees out.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

weese is waiting, anticipating.
foot tapping, fingers drumming.
she watches.
days pass. a week slips away.
they remain.
clinging, hopeful, indignant.
they mock her.
they taunt her.
weese is patient.
their time will come.
weese will be ready.
rake in hand.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

How old are you?

I am never quite sure how old I am.
I mean… I’m close, just a year off generally. But for some reason I just can’t seem to get a grip on the correct number. If you were to ask me – just flat out “Hey weese, how old are you?” Please don’t be surprised to get a deer-in-the-headlights look.

I am not in any way ashamed or embarrassed about my age. In fact, I revel in it. I wear my gray hairs proudly, never considering a bottled potion to cover them up. I am getting wrinkled, and have certainly noticed gravity’s strong hold.
It’s simply that I get confused about the specific number. Ah… does it really matter? What’s in a number anyway?

There are milestones of course. 1, 16, 18 (or 21 these days). After that we make milestones of the decades - 30, 40, 50 and so on.
Why do we do that? Why is 40 any more important than say… 42, or 38. I suppose it shouldn’t be – perhaps its just a way to pass the time.

I remember the day I turned 30, and I wondered if just by turning from 29 to 30 overnight, would I suddenly feel more like an adult? Would I feel grown up?
We had young kids, our first house, a puppy, new cars… all the things that equate us with actual, tax-payin’ grown ups.
Yet I still felt so … like I was in my 20’s.
Nothing happened that day.
And so I waited.
I waited another decade.
And when I turned 40 – I thought surely now I am an adult. Crap, I am middle aged. But still… I really felt no different. Well… aside from a couple new twinges here or there, and maybe the need for some 2 dollar magnifying glasses. I felt just the same. Just like me. Just like any other day.

I can say some things for certain as I am careening through my 40’s. Lots of things are changing now. My attitude has mellowed from my 30’s and my innards are gearing up for a transition and reminding me about then whenever they can. But at the end of the day – even tho the end of the day is now a few hours earlier than it used to be, I still feel a lot like person who thought they might grow up after 30.
I am still hoping to grow up… maybe when I turn 50.

Happy Birthday Teresa,
do you know how old you are?

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Jeep chick

I drove the Jeep to work yesterday.
It's a great responsibility. There is much to do when driving the Jeep.
First, I have to shift. I don't really understand why anyone would actually choose a standard transmission - but my rugged wife always has. So I have learned to drive them.
Then I have to constantly be watching for the 'Jeep wave'.
Evidently, people who drive Wranglers wave at each other.
All the time.
It's like a Jeep code.
So I feel its my responsibility to participate when I am driving her Jeep.
Finally, as if that's not enough,
I snapped a picture of the Knight who says 'Ni'. Jeeps are great for bobble heads, and with oversized tires - there is much bobble action.

This morning on my way to work I waved at someone in a Jeep. I was a bit dismayed they didn't wave back.
Then I realized I was in my Cabrio.

Monday, November 12, 2007

The Universe Speaks

I was complaining Sunday morning about having to go out and rake leaves all day. I procrastinated as long as I could …enjoying morning coffee, circling condos in the real estate section, and calling friends to commiserate.

We finally dragged ourselves out there for an afternoon’s work.
It was 39 degrees, and a breeze was just starting to kick in. Perfect.

We have a lot of leaves. Personally, I think we have more leaves than we do trees to support them. Some people’s leaves get blown away by the wind. Didja ever wonder where they went? … Pretty sure it’s my house.

I was somewhat curious, tho unfazed, when I found the pull cord to the lawn mower cut clean through. My best attempts to knot it and start the engine were foiled.
I moved on. We had a lot to do.
That’s when the tractor died.
It had been running… not 15 minutes earlier. Now… turn the key – nothing. The tractor is a huge part of our leaf removal process. This was not good.
I tried everything I knew. I opened the hood… looked at the engine, fiddled with the wires on the ignition. Got off, got on. Made sure the blades were disengaged. Turned the key several times – because that often works if you just keep trying.
It didn’t.
I am not a mechanic.
I abandoned it in the side yard.

We did as much hand raking and tarp hauling as we could stand… and went back in.
We put on the ball game and I pulled out the real estate section again.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007


Mawwiage ith waht bwings uth toghethah twudaaay.

My Sister-in-Law got married. Now I can officially call him my Brother-in-Law.

Our whole family was involved. The Daughter the Therapist and Ferris were in the wedding party.

Me.. and this handsome fellow, a dear friend of the happy couple, were appointed the 'Hosts'.

We were basically in charge. We greeted guests and got them to where they needed to be. Made sure the bridal party was ready and looking sparky. We made sure the guests had everything they needed, working closely with the caterer and waitstaff.

Oh right ...and my Officiant wife performed the ceremony.

These two are an amazing couple. They overflow with good energy.
They planned their ceremony together, wanting something that broke away from the mold yet retained some of a marriage ceremonies finer points.
The result was spiritual, playful and sweetly emotional.
Several people commented after the ceremony that they wanted to do theirs over again... that they didn't realize a ceremony could be like this.

EV and ML were married in a castle by the sea.

The ceremony was on the lawn looking over the water, with the reception inside this grand castle.

Our family arrived early to prep and get ready.
Here we have the bride - in civilian clothes, helping The Daughter The Therapist tie something.

Ferris - who showed up on time and perky, having rolled out of his dorm room after a very late night campus party, - helps his Poppop pull himself together.

My Officiant wife goes over the ceremony script one last time. I am sure that she hears me quietly in her head telling her not to cry during the ceremony. I spent most of the morning telling her to buck up. It did not work of course. Nor did I expect it to.

Someone asked me if I had brought scissors with me. Um... of course!

Once the gals were ready, MM and I got the guests organized

and made sure the wedding party was all lined up nicely.

Ahhh, can you just feel the love.

EV and ML had strong feelings about their ceremony in every detail. We spoke about this on several occasions. And when they asked me to do a reading, I was honored. And so I wanted to honor them:

EV and ML, its clear you took great care in selecting this place for your ceremony.
When you came upon this place, the beauty of Nature’s elements -- earth, water and air – certainly must have impressed you as it does us today.
In your honor, let’s pause to notice these elements surrounding us, in the same way that we surround you today
Let’s all take a moment to feel our connection to the earth below our feet. Let that remind us that we are all connected as family.
As we look out onto the ocean waters, we can allow our spirits to roll freely with the waves.
As we breathe in deeply, we’ll let the crisp October air fill us with openness, joy, and a boundless energy for life.
We are all overwhelmed and blessed by these divine elements. And when this day is done, may we always remember this place, and the sacred connection we have to each other and to all living things.

The ceremony was rich with spirituality with just a sprinkle of tradition.
We were all very moved.

...and then it was time for 'pictures'

...and THEN it was time for some cocktails... which, of course, led to some wild dancing.

and some romantic dancing

EL and ML got married in a castle by the sea.


Tuesday, November 06, 2007

its just another day

another day with no time for a lunch break
another day with no no time to write a blog post
another day with no no time for blog reading

please... don't be shy with your sympathies.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Take cover

Do you have seasonal anxiety? Do you have valium? Please send me some if you do.
Welp, its fall – and here we go again.

Lets be clear. My anxiety is not caused by the shorter days where my body is jonesin’ for vitamin D filled sunshine. Nope, this is all about my to do list.

I get this way every year. So much to do, so little time. While some folks are changing their wardrobes over and putting on the flannel sheets, my resourceful wife is taking out my flannel straight jackets (one must be seasonal when wearing a straight jacket – try to imagine my fall collection in a traditional woodsmen’s red plaid, where my summer attire would be more like linen or even seersucker which is nice and cool when you have your arms wrapped around your back).

Since we have been busy for several weekends in a row – the tasks are piling up, and so are the leaves. I am getting more anxious by the day.
So finally we have a weekend to get some work done outside and wouldn’t you just know what’s coming tomorrow?

Yup. That’s right folks. Pull up your lawn chairs and mull some cider. We’ll be raking leaves in a hurricane.

We are nothing …if not good entertainment.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Tuesday, October 30, 2007


Change is good.

I may need to change my ways.

My enlightened wife and I had a romantic sushi dinner this weekend and we spent some time sipping Sake and chatting about the next chapters in our lives.
We adore spending time plotting and planning, looking ahead. We change our minds often…but generally we have the same underlying desires.
One of those desires is to be good and caring stewards of the earth.

To do this – there may be some changes. Both long term and right now.

For the short term...
It’s pretty common knowledge I spend a good deal of time, money and effort on lawn care. I’ve done a lot of research, and have a good working knowledge of how to have a fine lawn. Our lawn is a work in progress. It’s a large plot and there are always areas to tend and improve. To manipulate nature to meet my needs I use a variety of chemical enhancements.
The results can be stunning.

But at what cost.

We saw a news story over the weekend on the disappearing bee problem plaguing beekeepers around the country. One theory, which is really quite logical, is that insecticides are playing a nasty role.
Which means I am part of the problem.

This is where I need to change.
This change will not come easy to me.
I have already asked my forgiving wife not to be too disappointed if at first I fail.
Perhaps sneaking out in the middle of the night to apply crabacide by flashlight, or justifying my chemical dependency on insecticides by saying --we’ll just use up what we have now.

My heart understands that what I am doing is wrong. But will I be able to stand strong when the dandelions turn to puff balls, or will I bend like a tree in the wind (note to wear goggles when spraying trees on a windy days).

Saturday, October 27, 2007

27 on 10/27/2007

Our little Peanut.

Can you really be 27?

May your birthday be covered in kitties.

Happy Happy Birthday!

Friday, October 26, 2007



You know how in bathroom sinks the drain is a little stopper, with the lever in between the faucets that you pull up to keep water in the sink...

Well did you know that stopper thing unscrews?
It does.
And you should.
Unscrew it and take it out every so often.
You'll see why.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Let them eat cake!

Someone left the remnants of one of those humonguous sheet cakes in the kitchen at work today.
It's from BJ's.

I stared at it thinking how rarely I eat cake, or pastry or even cookies. Very rarely in fact.
So, if I were to have some cake - it certainly would not be a sheet cake from BJ's.
I want something spectacular.
A sliver of triple, chocolate, lacey something or another served on an expenisive, oversized plate with fanciful drizzles of fruity, syrupy swirls. A cake so rich that I would be forced to set down my fork before the plate was emtpy. A cake so supple that it slid across my tongue and melted ever so....

oops... sorry - I got carried away there.

But my point is this. Cake is not something anyone should be eating often. It's a treat. It should be rare, and it should be special.
So make it so.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Ménage' toi

Tho the threesome is happening only in my head.
And it’s not hot and steamy.
It’s more like a bad game of Twister. There are three of us in here Vanity, Conscience and Sensibility. It’s like a weesey twist on Freud’s Id, Ego and Superego[1]. And while I consider Freud to be a genius, albeit a deranged genius… my three decided we needed our own definitions. Plus, we didn’t like all those freaky parental references.

What keeps usme from being committed is simply that often times we agree. We know our own strengths, and easily bend to the others area of authority. Sometimes we even work together in pairs.

Take for example getting dressed each morning. Vanity and Sensibility often work together on this to pick an outfit that is both attractive and suits the day’s activity. They are a good team. Let’s say I am feeling svelte one morning. Well then Sensibility will concede to any apparel decision Vanity may arrive at. But let’s just say I’ve had chocolate cake and beer all weekend - Vanity sits quietly while we select something a bit more blousy.
One can argue that in such a case Sensibility is really being vain in trying to cover up any weekend indiscretion in diet, so perhaps it’s not really all Sensibilities decision… and thus arguing may ensue. The decision usually stands, but someone needs to get credit.
Of course it doesn’t end there. What if something goes wrong? Such as when Vanity selects white shorts for a picnic and then there is a spill – well doncha know Conscience steps in to point the finger every time…

So here we are, we three – riding around on the tractor this weekend. And boy was there a raucous lawn discussion going on. Each had such a good point that we actually left it at a stand still and went inside to watch football instead.
Here is our dilemma. Vanity wants to fertilize. In fact, it was Vanities decision to get the fertilizer without the weed-killer so that we could over apply thus achieving a better greening effect.
Sensibility, on the other hand, wants to stop spending all this money on the lawn.
And Conscience knows that if we decided not to fertilize we may later regret this decision.
Conscience also knows there is a possibility of regretting the money spent as well. So you see – our tie breaker Conscience is not helping at all.

Which is why we decided to go in and watch football – where immediately Vanity wanted a beer and Conscience had to remind Vanity, yet again, about the repercussions of beer drinking on our diet… when Sensibility steps in and has the audacity to say she wants a piece of bread – BREAD the other two scream… you must be joking!

It’s a wonder I get anything done at all really.

[1] Id
In Psychoanalytical theory, the part of the personality which contains our primitive impulses such as sex, anger, and hunger. The id doesn't care about reality, about the needs of anyone else, only its own satisfaction.
The part of the personality which maintains a balance between our impulses (id) and our conscience (superego). The ego is based on the reality principle. The ego understands that other people have needs and desires and that sometimes being impulsive or selfish can hurt us in the long run.
The Superego is the moral part of us and develops due to the moral and ethical restraints placed on us by our caregivers. Many equate the superego with the conscience as it dictates our belief of right and wrong.

Saturday, October 20, 2007



If your clothes dryer is in your main living space or anywhere near an exterior door - when you empty your lint trap (which you are doing EVERY time you do a load) step just outside the door to clean it and then give it a good shake. This will keep loads of dust out of the house.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

I love NY

I don't really.
I am from Connecticut.
I love Connecticut.
I tolerate New York because it's, as my metropolitan wife calls it, the capital of the world.
Have you ever driven in Manhattan?
I have.
And I am not very good at it.

So here we are, entertaining a coupla Texans with a trip into Manhattan to visit the Metropolitan Museum of Art. It's a favorite stop for us. We were going to see a special exhibit The Age of Rembrandt. I love Rembrandt. Tho I like many other Dutch Masters as well. We also love the American Wing - those fabulous Hudson River School artists. This display of Dutch painters was organized by donor, rather than artist. It was a fascinating look into American art collectors.
But I digress.
So... we were sitting on Central Park West getting ready to make a left turn into The Park. Doncha just love a ride through the park in Autumn?
Well... I overshot the intersection ever so slightly, so when the light turned - there we were squarely in the crosswalk.
I can see I am in the cross walk.
I can see there are people who need to use the cross walk to cross the street.
I feel remorse.
But, this is New York. And it wouldn't be New York unless I was properly reprimanded.
My reprimand this day came from an attractive yuppyish woman pushing a stroller, her husband clearly in tow.
My windows are up, so she mouths to me with a scowl only a true New Yorker can pull off. "You're in the crosswalk."
She also gestured to the lines, which was helpful - because I am clearly an idiot.
Because I am from Connecticut I mouth to her that I am sorry and I realize where I am, and that it's not where I intended to be, and that if I could move I would, but in the case there really was no where else for me to go but to sit and wait patiently for the light to change while she yelled at me.
She rolled her eyes, and flagrantly made a wide arc around the front of my car.
I kept my foot firmly on the brake.
Because I am from Connecticut.

All in all I consider this light action. The last time I got yelled at in the Big Apple was from a very unhappy NYPD officer on foot in Times Square. He actually leaned into the car to yell loudly at me and was not going to let me go anywhere until he said his peace. I thought he was going to rip me out of the front seat, strip search me and take me to the local precinct.
I was driving a van at the time. The kids were in the back. Luckily they were wearing seatbelts. I think that's the only thing that kept me from being tossed into the slammer. After the fear wore away - they were rather amused. Me, not so much.

Ah well, there's always Metro North.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

FREE dog

That's not the title of the post - its a classified.
Do you want a FREE dog? Really. FREE. I will even drive her over.

free to a good home

Or...perhaps if you just call her out the back door she will show up.
That's because she has pretty much rendered the fence useless.
She has somehow figured out how to bend the chain link fence up to create a hole big enough to fit through.

Her first attempt was futile - because there was a wood pile on the other side.

I smart can she really be if she didn't think that through - so I wasn't worried.
Of course now I realize this was probably just a test hole.

The next time she did it, I thought perhaps the fence had already been loose in that area. So I just grabbed a chain from the garage to fix it temporarily.

Then she did it again.

Now understand that the fence is attached to a 2 inch bottom rail with thick metal twist tie things. They are wrapped around tightly and then twisted several times.
I am trying to figure out how she is getting those off. I have these images of her out there at night in the deep dark of the back yard, working on them one at a time. Every so often glancing up furtively at the house to see if we are watching. Kind of like a well planned prison break. Then, of course, during the day when we are all out in the backyard together she completely ignores the fence so as not to draw attention to her work... clever that one.

This time I used some bungee cords and rope.
I knew this fix was temporary and that it was time to call in professional help.
Yes, I really thought it would hold... at least for a week.
Silly weese.
Here is what happened on Saturday.

My clever and exasperated wife shored up this hole with some garden fencing we had laying around.

So now we have wire, rope, bungees, chains, and cables keeping the fence together.
And FREE dog has to be monitored during her time out in the yard.

The fence guy came by on Sunday. He says he's never seen anything like this.
He stared, and shook his head, and asked several times what type of dog she was.
He'll be back this week to repair and replace large parts of the fence.

Tho I am just about ready to open the gate and call it a day.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Thank you

I am using this public forum to acknowledge all the various people involved in my very happy, fun filled birthday weekend.
To all those virtual and non virtual particpants - thank you.
You have made this weese feel very warm and fuzzy and loved.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

there is a time

Autumn is a busy time. The leaves are turning and falling. The birds are gathering in great numbers to make their trek south. And weese begins to ponder and pontificate about the universe and the changing of the seasons and the great joy that the peace of the winter months can bring...

The days are getting shorter and darker. This frightens and upsets many people. The darkness feels as if it’s encroaching on their energy, stifling their joy.

I think, rather, we should look forward to this time of year. It’s a time for healing, of inner rebuilding, of rest. Winter is a necessary time -- juxtaposed to the banter and frivolity of the warm summer months with those long, endless days, and hot, festive evenings -- sometimes enhanced by pink fruity cocktails.

As the days shorten, let the darkening afternoons snuggle you into the sanctuary of your home. Think of the darkness as a warm blanket.
Let it be an excuse to sit and reflect and rest.
And while you are sitting and reflecting and resting - don't become sad or maudlin.
Remember to rejoice in the place you call home. If you cannot - then fix that first.
Your home must be the place you feel best. Fall is a good time to put that in order.
Set your house right, and let the winter happen.
Remember that spring feels so good because of winter.

But hey… before you go sitting down and putting your feet up – remember there’s a whole lot of fall maintenance to do... more on that later.

Monday, October 08, 2007


Well... yes, cutting the nails was amazing -- but really I referring to the wedding.

Ok, so did you want some pictures of the wedding? Yeah -- me too.
I actually brought two cameras - and never really touched either one.
So I'll have to wait until someone else posts some somewhere.

For now - we just cracked open our first 'hair of the dog'.
More on that later...

Saturday, October 06, 2007


Thanks for all the great nail tips... tho after tomorrow I won't need them.
Seriously...these things have to come off.

Despite the fact that I can't pick things up, button my own buttons, or type anymore... we've been busy with wedding preparations this week.

Today was the rehearsal dinner, and tomorrow is the wedding! (which basically means two more days till I can cut my nails... oo am I dwelling a bit).

In the meantime - here's a quick tip-o-day ...

If you're using clear glass vases for your table center pieces - be sure to wash them thoroughly before filling. To get them spot free, wash in super hot water. Thick dish washing gloves are a must for this task.

I love these blue ones. They are thick enough so I can use dishwater over 200°.

Monday, October 01, 2007

Femme Fatale

Ladies, ladies, ladies...
how do you do it?

The Sister-In-Law is marrying The Brother-In-Law this Sunday. We are all very excited.
So as part of my wedding accoutrement (yes.. blatent over use of one of my favorite words) I have been growing my nails. The will look FABulous with my outfit. I am wearing black and silver... it's Tahari... I am having my hair cut on Thursday, eyebrows done Friday... wait till you see the shoes.
I am so down with that whole butch-femme thing.

But Oh. MY. Goodness... the nails are making me INsane.

First, there is the maintenance. I have been keeping them polished - because it keeps them strong and frankly at this length I think it looks better.
The time commitment for painting nails is ridiculous. We can put a man on the moon but it takes HOW long for nail polish to dry(flawlessly)? At least when I am painting ...say the garage doors... I can go do something else while I wait for the paint to dry.
But this... THIS requires I do absolutely nothing for the entire dry time. One slip-up and the entire finish is ruined. Do you have any idea how impossible it is to keep weese still for any more than 10 minutes? I have a very short attention span.

Ok so there's that...

Then you have to deal with them just being there. Typing becomes a chore, the remote control takes concentration, and dialing my cell phone is simply silly to watch. Not to mention trying to use hand tools or even just chores around the house.

My Monday morning... a nice tall mimosa, perhaps a breakfast scone, and the nail clippers.

my walk

I walked at lunch today. It’s part of the new diet regimen.
I find it pleasant enough – it breaks up the day, and it’s not as involved as say… going to the gym.
Which I abhor.
It’s not that I don’t like to work hard. I would just prefer there to be a result of my hard work. O sure…weight loss, fitness, energy, blah blah – but I’d rather something a bit more tangible. Like say … I work really hard for a couple hours a day for a week or so and WALA there’s an addition on the house.
Or… I spend ½ hour in the morning and 20 minutes each afternoon and BINGO I’ve got a patio with outdoor grilling station – you see my point.

But the walking is fine.
I walked alone today – because my walking pal, J9, is a slacker (lets see if that gets her to comment). Since I was alone I had plenty of time with my own thoughts.
So I was walking along deep in thought weighing my options for the lawns fall feeding schedule when I noticed that most of the people walking alone had ipod-ish type things. (I almost typed ‘walkman’ ha!).

I pondered this.

Why do people listen to music as they walk? Does the beat motivate them? Do they change their pace when different songs come on? What type of music do they listen to? Do they silently sing along? Does it help to pass the time? I wondered if some people do it because they are uncomfortable doing things alone. I wondered if certain songs conjured memories… were they reminiscing as they walked. Did some songs make them sad… or happy? Some folks had ear buds, others had headphones – this made me think of the shape of my ears. I happen to have very large ears... well really its the lobes. Then I wondered which earrings I was wearing because I had forgotten. For a short time I played a little game where I tried to figure out which ones were in my ears without reaching up to find out. Then I saw a guy with a hat and wondered if he would have hat head by the time he got back to the office. I ended up behind a woman wearing her Ipod in one of those sporty armbands. I wondered if she had gotten it as a gift. Maybe on a holiday, maybe it was her birthday. Maybe they had cake that day. Cake has flour…and sugar – both of which are not on my diet. The walking is on my diet tho. Which is where this all started about ½ an hour ago. That's when I saw my reflection in the glass door to my office building and noticed which earrings I was wearing...

So…while someone singing sweetly in my ears for my ½ hour walk would be lovely –
I am thoroughly entertained by the tangents of my own thoughts.

I am glad I left my Ipod in the car.

Friday, September 28, 2007



This is actually more of a reminder.
Do you need to seed, re-seed or over seed - do it now.

Fall is for planting. New grass will come up lush and thick and it still has time to get strong before winter.
It's also a great time to install new shrubs or transplant existing ones. Warm days and cool, moist nights make for great root development.

Go on... go plant.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Singing in the...

There was a tall, somewhat athletic woman who walked ahead of me into the ladies room this morning. She apparently works across the hall at another company, and I have seen her just once before so perhaps she is new. She is young, maybe late 20's, and attractive in a natural, hip sorta way. From the way she dresses and carries herself I wondered briefly if she played on my team. Could go either way I decided, and entered a stall.

That's when she started to hum... or even sort of sing softly as she entered the far stall. I thought this curious - and thought how people don't really sing much, and certainly I have never heard singing in the ladies room.
Should I consider this odd? Would this make me uncomfortable? Was this woman very happy? Was she melancholy? Clearly she was confident.
My mind was wandering down this path when I paused it to listen. The sound was genuinely beautiful. Sweet and sultry and only added to by that wondrous tiled-room echoey reverb. It was enchanting. I was surprised at myself for so thoroughly enjoying it.
And then it was over, interrupted by the rush of flowing waters and the soft thud of the door.

I have just refilled my water bottle, and anticipate several trips to the ladies room today.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

in the night

I woke up somewhere around 3:00 this morning because of a wacky, somewhat scary dream. It didn't take me long to realize I had been dreaming and that I was now awake and safe and comfy with my slumbering wife close by.

Then suddenly, out of nowhere, I realized I had a grammatical error in yesterday's post.
I mean... the error just instantly popped into my head.

How does stuff like that happen?

Monday, September 24, 2007

Here we go again

It's that time of year where we begin to change over the wardrobe.
My work attire has shifted from shorts to pants.
And we all know what that means ...right?

It means weese freaks out because half her pants don't fit.
(someone should probably send my patient wife a bottle of red)

I have tried to lose these very same pounds before.
These pounds love me, they are clinging to me tightly.
But I have resolve and no fear of trying again... and again.
(make that two bottles of red for my understanding wife).

And so I started a new diet yesterday.
It's rather regimented, which is good for weese, weese likes regiment.
Oddly this diet includes no beer.

I will let you know how it goes. Which basically means- if I start losing weight you can be sure I'll be blogging about it, and if I don't... well, that will be the end of that then, huh.

Treading trodden trails for a long, long time.
Dave Matthews Band

Friday, September 21, 2007



Got balls?
I do.
Dryer balls.

I tried these only recently and am so pleased that they made the tip-o-day list.

We have a stacked washer/dryer. Not the fancy new front loader ones - ours is probably a dozen years old. (yes... to those who have seen it... its that old. Perhaps another tip will be how to keep your washer/dryer looking like new.)
They work well, and while they are labled 'full' size machines they are somewhat small. We do our best not to overload them - but regardless the dryer has always taken a long time to complete its work.

Then Aunt Arlene told us about Dryer Balls.
Skeptically I gave them a shot, and was very pleased to find that the clothes dried in less time and had less wrinkles.

The only down side to Dryer Balls can occur when you are unloading the dryer and one or both of these bouncy laundry aids falls out and skips playfully across the floor in the general direction of the FREE dog.
Luckily, we have several of those 20% off coupons for BB&B.