Monday, March 31, 2008

A tiny little hole in our hearts

I woke Sunday morning to find my early-rising wife at the table catching up on her March Madness standings.
I noticed in the garden next to the patio there were two squirrels busily eating up seeds and nuts and such. The FREE dog had not seen them yet – so I let them go about their business for awhile.
When I finally let her out she had her fun chasing them up a tree.
So the next time she whimpered to go out I assumed they had returned for more tasty nuts.
I watched as she darted out the door and then was horrified to see she was after a cat.
I ran out after her to call her off the poor thing. She rolled the cat once but the cat was able to get away and up a tree. Once I was finally able to get the FREE dog back into the house the cat jumped out of the tree and ran away.


Not to long after that my worried wife called me out to the back yard. She told me she had just seen the FREE dog out in the yard and watched her ever so gently place something on the ground and then walk very slowly away.

We ran out to find a very tiny kitten.
Eyes still closed, but not freshly born – maybe a week or so old.
The kitten was breathing, tho labored.

We wrapped the little fluffy fellow in a towel and brought him in.
My now very worried wife went out to look for more. I consulted the Great And Powerful Internet for advice, the little orange kitten laying next to the laptop on the table snuggled in a hand towel.

We got some warm water to clean him up a bit. He had a wound – tho it didn’t look deep. The FREE dog must have been very gentle. I stroked his little head and he responded well to the attention.
I called a local emergency vet and got further advice on how to care for this very new very tiny little life.

As we coddled over him, my allergic-to-cats wife and I discussed how we would care for him over the coming weeks. I planned to bring him to the office so I could feed him several times during the day. We planned to get up every couple of hours for night feedings.
I whispered in his little furry ears that he was safe now and that he was home.

Despite our best efforts and noblest of intentions our little kitty died. Right there on the dining room table. We were comforted by the fact that he died with us, warm and loved – rather than out in the backyard in a pile of leaves.
My saddened wife named him Shere Kahn – for he was brave.

He has been laid to rest in our yard, right next to our other warrior.

Friday, March 28, 2008

be there in the dark



I have berated and teased about taking down Holiday decorations in a timely fashion.
It's simply inappropriate to have them up past their time.

Ah.. but - there are other, practical reasons to follow these rules.

Yes, that's ours.

We took the bows and decorations off our holiday wreath this year and thought we would just keep the natural greens until the end of winter. It looked so welcoming right there next to the door.
Earlier this month we joked about leaving it up until after Easter.
And we did.
It was a joke.

Now, its a home.

When I told my coddling-wife of this discovery she was thrilled.

So... if you come to visit us within the next 4-8 weeks - expect to see a sign at the end of the walk redirecting you to another entrance, as well as a tarp on the porch floor under the new family (this is mostly for me).

Wednesday, March 26, 2008


I work in a pleasant enough environment.

I have a little heater under my desk, because my blood seems to slow down to a crawl when I sit in front of the computer for more than 15 minutes at a time.

I was able to turn off all the bright, fluorescent lights over my space, because I feel they rot my brain.

I have several toys (and other fun things) in my warm, dark cubicle.
We have soothing fish to view and feed and tend to.

All the free coffee you can drink, subsidized food and soda, bagels on Fridays... and right now they are having a cookie break, complete with milk, in the lunch room.

Seems nice...huh?

Then why is it our Administrative Coordinator has no choice but to keep sacred office supplies - such as spiral notebooks, in a locked cabinet.

These things confound me.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

testing, testing

After my last incident with headphones I thought it might be wise to branch out a bit.

I thought I would give the earbuds a try.

So far so good.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

It's a good thing I peed

On my way home from work last night I was pulling through an intersection in my very busy office complex when my Cabrio decided to stop... all systems shut down... in the middle of the intersection. Just my luck a Semi was headed directly for me. There was a brief moment of panic after I switched on the hazard lights and tried to jump out to wave at the driver of the really big truck hurtling at me... only to be stopped by my seat belt (hmm, safety first?).

The driver was a pro - he had noticed immediately that my car was in distress and even parked his truck across the lanes so no on-coming traffic would plow into me.
He got out and pushed my car neatly to the side of the road and went on his way. The world is filled with nice people.
It was a busy time of evening so I ended up waiting in the car for about an hour for a tow. I had plenty of time to think... it was quiet and really quite nice, except a little chilly. But I was thankful it was not below freezing, I was very thankful I had remember my gloves that morning, and even more thankful I peed before I left work.
Always-- ladies, always pee before you go.

So I am working from my home today. And you know what that means.
Yup... distractions.

I tossed in a load of laundry - thinking this would not really take me away from my day job too much. But then I remember that the dryer seemed to be taking too long, so I stepped outside to peek at the vent on the roof.

Looked clogged.

Ok - welp, in order to get my work done, I clearly need to dry this load of clothes, and in order to do that I clearly need to clean out this vent.

The problem really lies in the fact that its on the roof.

weese doesn't do roofs.

So I needed to devise a tool. Won't take long I figured, I'll be back to my day job in no time at all.
Down to the workshop to gather some supplies.

(the hammer? ...well you never know)

I made this.

Put up a ladder.

Then, using a second pole to keep the weather flap open - I was able to clean out a good bit of lint.

And... no injuries. I was back at my day job in less than an hour. The drying is purring away right now.

Ok... really, now I have to get back to work... right after I...

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

happy fish

I like fish... like fish in a tank... like fish which are pets.

I like sushi as well - tho I suppose this is somewhat of a conflict of interest... in context of this post.

For the purposes of this entry lets assume that each time I mention 'fish' I am thinking of them in their pre-sushi state.

And so... I like fish.

We have a tank here at the office, and each day I spend some time with them.

I pull a chair up close to the tank and simply watch. They don't seem to mind.

They make me peaceful.
They bring me joy.

Monday, March 17, 2008


We went to pick Ferris up from the airport the other night.
We arrived a few minutes early and my eager wife and I were milling about the baggage claim area when the first call came in.

Ferris: Where are you guys?
Weese: In baggage claim.
Ferris: Well you could get the car…
Weese: Not to worry, we scored an excellent spot very close by.
Ferris: Umm… ok

My obliging wife decides… what the heck… and goes to pull up the car.
She’s cute that way.

I pick out a chair near the baggage belt and sit patiently waiting doing a little people watching.

Second call.

Ferris: Where are you?
Weese: I am still in baggage claim, Mom went to get the car a couple of min…
Ferris: Ok, I need you to go to the car… do you understand?
Weese: Yup... on my way – how about if we wait out in the parking lot, rather than by the curb.
Ferris: That would be better. Bye

See… I have a knowing.

I go out to the curb to find my waiting wife.

Weese: Ok we need to drive away.
My Confused Wife: Huh..Drive? Where, why?
Weese: Actually, um… we need to go back into the parking lot.
My Frugal Wife: Hmm, I just paid to get OUT of the parking lot??

So we circle the airport as I explain the second call.

We decided to park near the curb but far away enough to be ignored if necessary.
Ferris walks across the street and waves – this must mean the coast is clear so we pull up.

Weese: So …what was it?
Ferris: She was so hot.

Friday, March 14, 2008



Forgive me...I should have given you this tip at the start of the long, cold winter season - tho I suppose you can apply it to windy March days as well.

When you go to a restaurant or place of business... but really this applies mostly to restaurants - where they have installed two doors, with a space between them - please refrain from opening both doors at the same time.
I see this all the time, especially with families. They open the first door and the family starts to pile into what might be a small space between the doors, then they open the second door while the first door behind them is still open and start piling in and tussling with coats and chatting back and forth at one another.
I am sure you have seen this - and I am sure you have been the recipient of the cold gust of air as a result.

There are two doors for a reason.
The business went to great expense to install the second door to keep their patrons comfortable.
So please, open the first door, gather your family together if you must - then allow the first door to close prior to opening the second door.
This way - the folks inside can stay warm and toasty, as the proprietor intended.

Small kindnesses.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008


Look at my new office toy!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008


We have an agenda?!?
Why am I always the last to know these things.

(I discovered these gems through some blogger pals)

Oh... what the heck, while I'm at it - try this too.

Friday, March 07, 2008



O sure… I may come off as a know-it-all, with my tips and suggestions – but I am also the first to admit when I’m not. In manysome cases I am even an idiot.
So today’s tip is something that hit me in the forehead with an audible ‘DUH’.

My ardent wife and I enjoy lighting candles in our bedroom. It sets a wonderfully serene, sultry mood, and the dancing lights are a pleasure to watch wrapped in our warm sheets.
The problem has always been… that ‘someone’ (where are those servants when you need them) must, at some point prior to sleep, extricate themselves from the aforementioned warm sheets to blow the damn things out.
Sometimes its just easier to not light them at all.



We burn them in small glass holders, and they go out by themselves in about 2 – 3 hours.
My clever wife had the idea to put up a small shelf so we could easily see the happy flames flickering from bed.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

You can check in but....

They called it a hotel but it screamed motel to me. The furnishings were dated, but clean. We had a second floor room overlooking the parking lot. And when I say overlooking I mean through an enormous picture window. Our room was really more of a small apartment. We had a sitting area with a small TV, on one of those 70’s style TV carts with the wheels. I wondered briefly if it might be black and white. There was a kitchenette with that fantastic white speckled Formica sporting chrome edges. On the other side of that wall there was the bed with a chenille coverlet and a small bureau.
The red slip-covered sofa was saggy and surprisingly comfortable. The slipcover even smelled freshly washed. This, of course, pleased me.

We had just come in from being out… possibly to dinner… and we left the lights off as we came in. There was a sultry ambient light streaming in the giant window from the street lights across the parking lot. It only added to the already garish, somewhat surreal atmosphere.

In that light, settled into our cheesy surroundings I found myself feeling a bit amorous… in a pulp novel sort of way. After all these years my sultry wife knows in a glance where my mind is. She shot me back a look that was devilish and playful. In a place like this, really there are only two ways to feel; the first being mildly grossed out, or this fictional, seedy sexiness in a grungy, slumming sorta way.

We settled onto the couch, bathed in that pale yellow light from the night life outside, kissing and fondling like teenagers.
My steamy wife lifts her head throwing her hair back and mentions, almost in passing, that the fire flares out the window were so romantic… casting a red color, intensifying our passion.

I sat bolt upright. That passion sloughing off like rain water.

Fire flares? Out the window? Huh?!

We both stood slowly, and approached the large window tentatively. In the distance we saw red flaring, bright flames shooting skyward. Not fire though, more like explosions.
Then in the distance, tiny lights approaching through the night sky. It took a minute before we realized they were planes, and then another moment to understand they were fighter planes. Some of them prop jobs– like from the Big War. I am not sure why this didn’t surprise me, this coalescing of era’s, but we were under attack and didn’t really have time to ponder such trivialities.

We hit the floor prone as the planes flew over our hotel. Fearing the unseen pilots would notice us in that giant window and open fire. I imagined them to have those machine guns mounted under the wings like I had seen in the movies.

After they passed we knew we needed to spring to action. Our eyes met briefly – the look so different than the one we just shared moments before. I told my frightened wife that we should grab our bags, packing quickly and most likely having to leave behind many of our belongings. In my minds eye I saw our green luggage in the closet and items strewn around the bed and in the bathroom. I started to try to think about what was where and what to grab – our belongings from home kept mixing with these thoughts and I had to keep correcting my inner eye to remind myself we were not home – but we sure needed to get there.
With all this noise going on in my own head it took a moment to register the next sound.
The slow, heavy sound of tires on sand. A sort of grating, crunching noise – but it seemed bigger than tires. My shaky wife and I went to the smaller side window only to see, in disbelief, a tank pulling into the far parking lot with a soldier walking beside it easily able to keep up to its slow pace. It turned its great treads on a dime and stopped as if to park in a parking space, though it took up most of a row.

Forget the bags – we had to go …now.

We made our way down the darkened back stairs and snuck out the side door to the car. Running off on foot didn’t occur to me. In retrospect, I am not sure why.

With all the clamor outside I wasn’t too worried about the sound of the car, it was the lights that I feared would give us away. My little green convertible has daytime running lights; these come on as soon as the emergency brake is released. I reasoned we could simply drive with the brake pulled slightly – one problem solved. Then I remembered the brake lights. Perhaps I should just smash them, but my cautious self got the better of me –so I opened the trunk to pull the bulbs. The trunk light went on, but it seemed dim enough not to cause a stir. I was wrestling with the light covers when…

when… I woke up.

Ok.. who the hell dreams like this?

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Office supplies

I like to keep some cleaning supplies at the office. Also, this time of year(cold and flu season) I keep Lysol on hand as well as that hand sanitizer stuff.

Well, and a couple other things... just in case.

Monday, March 03, 2008

How many pages in a tree

60 catalogs so far.

5:15 pm
I just got home to find 5 more in the post today. FIVE more. Will it ever end?