A woman at the bank

I went to the ATM… to take out cash – because Ferri$ runs on AAA batteries and twenty dollar bills.

An old woman was ahead of me. She was quite old, tiny, somewhat frail even.
As she tried to use the ATM she was clearly confused. Not sure how to put her card in… or what the buttons meant. As I considered helping her (banking is a very personal thing…I was aware that I might be intruding…or even frightening if I offered to assist with her banking), a woman behind me sighed heavily and went to her side.
She snatched the card from her and spoke cruelly “Just put it in THIS way! Then enter your number”, then almost shrilly “Your PIN, you MUST know your PIN!”
This younger woman (well…my age – not young) was clearly agitated. I assumed from the resemblance they were mother and daughter. Clearly they had some relationship.

The old woman continued to attempt to use the machine, asking questions as she went. She was not cross ...at all. She was simply confused, and probably overwhelmed.

When the other ATM machine freed up, I motioned to the younger woman “Please, go right ahead.” Again the heavy sigh… “Thanks but, I am going to be here a long time.” The disdain and meanness in her voice cut through me.

I can’t remember all her words but she continued to berate this small elderly woman, as I processed my transactions.

I try to always remember that there are facts I am not privy too. This is very important to me. This helps me to not be judgmental. This is why I have no road rage for example. If someone cuts me off – I realize that I don’t know their circumstances. Perhaps their child is hurt and they are in a rush, perhaps their dog got out of the fence and they need to get home quickly, perhaps they are in the middle of a divorce and just not thinking. How can I judge them without knowing all the facts?

Of course, that’s easier to do when you are in a car.
But standing right there – in the energy… this was hard.

Clearly this relationship had years of history which I knew nothing about. Perhaps this tiny gray woman was mean to her daughter, perhaps she abandoned her, geez she could have even beat her.

I didn’t know the facts.
But the truth of it was… I doubted it.
And the way this woman treated her mother – broke my heart.